knocking on heaven's door

With belly full of nice meal, i went to the fountain behind the mountain which officially is for burning incense for the deities but imprinted with countless footprints of mine, as rememberance of being naughty and competitor to monkeys! The fountain is bit larger than a tennis courtyard, beautiful stupa on the further side of the fountain encircled by lamps made out of iron and bronze, a beautiful but not too big meadow is laying before the Stupa to give it life, and right in front of the Studpa is a statues of Cherenzig (Avalokeshrawa) drenched in swinging water pool and four steps above the statues is a round zise podium bit larger then dinner table enriched with scriptures and symbols represent the twelve deeds of Lord Buddha. This is a monument we built to remember one of the great teacher that we had who was not only a scholar but also a practitioner with eminent signs and comprehension.
As being a child, i used to go there to play wristling on the meadow and right now when i go there to kora, it restrospect everything back to my memory which is quite intereseting and impressive, that's why i kept on stepping on this beautiful place everytime after dinner and you bet dinner served very early in my place, 6.30pm!!! ( i make it point to prepare something for supper, otherwise i have to say goodbye to Goodnight sleep) As usual today i came to the fountain and did my kora but unusual thing is i was alone today, prior times i accompany some of my friends who are very keen to listening my stories in India and i had to explain everything to them ( i mean everything!!!) while we are doing kora! Some foreigners kept on staring at us when my friends make loud sounds of surprise and exclamation, but we keep on our way because we love to have space for us. Today was different because i was alone and place was also not crowd as usual, so i went on round the stupa for several times with earphone plug into my ears and bluffing nothing out of my month which sounds like reciting sacred words, which is no doubt a point to stare and note for the foreigner but there were few of them, at the same time, i wasn't paying enough attention to the enviroment because my mind was fully concentrate on greater topic then the blue eyes!
I WAS THINKG ABOUT LIFE! I was wondering how a silent atmosphere can provide so much calmness and happiness to our mind that we can't believe ourself, at that time when i look at my mind i need nothing from the world, money, car, house and furnitures, even the iphone i brought with me. NOthing at all! ( though it is very very rare for me to feel allergic with my phone, because it is an IPHONE for God's sake!!) i just want to enjoy the moment that mother-nature provide to me, that silent moment, i want it to be never cease to exist but i know it won't last long because i have to get back into the daily life which is quite opposite to the moment i was enjoying, noicy enviroment, crazy ( not literally!!) people with full acceleration life pursuing. Then i can't stop wondering why we always end up in chaos when we really need is peace and silent, we struggle very hard to get ten thousand when we really need is five thousand, when we got the ten Gs then we aim for Twenty Gs then Thirty..... gradually we forgot what our mind wants and we knows it only then when we take our last breath.
Maybe it is the nature of life, or nature of our world that keep us far away from peace and silent, whatever it is i was enjoying that particular moment very much and i was listening to a song titled "Knock Knock Knocking on the Heaven's Door"

གལ་སྲིད་འདི་འགྲིག་ན།

ON MY KNEEL

Life confronts parallel path when leading to the end from begin. On the way everyone experienced what they didn’t plan, but which make them grown up.
1---This experience starts when we are born and initiated crawling with the help of our two most sacred “friends”, first they sunk in uncontrolled laugh and exclaimed with joy at our first walk on four legs with the unspecific language. “My dear child, come here, come here!” They clapped their hands with encouragement and called us with that genius smile, at that very moment we fell, again hear their beautiful beckon and we start again on our four legs, again we fell, again they called, again we fell, and again they called. In this procedure eventually we are success in ‘wandering’ around the house and ‘speaking’ in our own language which magically they understand. Gradually they start correcting our language and they can’t control when we first called them Mom and Dad.
2---Huhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sign! Wipe! cry ! “ my dear children, don’t cry, I will give you chocolate and come to receive you than we can eat ice-cream together” this ‘temptation’ cheer us up a bit and when we are distracting with the sweet tongue and laughter of other friends, they vanished in some corner with promise of getting back to us again. Other friends are there, same age and same condition, with a mark of tear on their cheeks. We strolled into a beautiful room decorated with attractive toys and pictures, instantly we forgot the experienced and start dwelling on the floor, picking things, padding toys and playing with them. Innocent mind of our friends and us open the curtain of privacy and we started showing things around. “this is mine” said us, “No! this is mine” said others, “No! if you try to take it away from me than I will called my father and he is very brave, I am sure he will beat you” said us, “I will called my father as well and brother also, they can beat your father” said others……..! echoing with noises from every direction, the same decorated room become a hut of crying babies. Eventually when we back to school gate where our sacred friends are waiting, we started complaining. They said nothing, because they know this same complain will transform into compliment at the end when we declared this and that is my friend.
3---We draw things which parents praised and teachers rejoice, but still we haven’t touch the real drawing which our friends called Alphabet, A, B, C, D, E…….! when they pampered us to write them on some ornament book with cute pencil, they don’t mind for the A which hardly has any sign of A, they hold our hands and rewrite the word, some time they bribe us with sweets, sometime threaten us with pinch and some time owed us with compliment. Accordingly our reaction arouse in the form of satisfaction, tear and smile! Similarity in them and us is we never give up, they don’t give up because they believe in us and we don’t give up because we are not allow to give up! After some months and years, we recognized words and start writing to our sacred friends which always let them cry with joy and hope.
4---Neither we crawled on the floor nor we boast of possessing powerful and well build parents when we were mature enough to showing our strength, “I know about this which they don’t know, I have this which they only dream about, I can do this which they won’t darn to do, I like he but not “he”, she is so proud and ostentatious, they are so barbaric…..!” But they are always something which we don’t know even we think we know, always something which we only dream about, always something which hesitate in doing. Again the “he” that we liked opinion us and encourage us to go further, the “he” that we don’t liked put more effort on what they doing and envied us to go further, the “she” we cursed start changing and educate us to go further, the “they” that we think barbaric applause us and emotion us to go further.
Yes!!! To go further!
5---Life confronts parallel path when leading to the end from begin, on the way everyone experienced what they didn’t plan, but which make them grown up. The only contributor in our growth and maturity is FRIEND! In the form of sacred “friends” which we named parents, in the form of first “friends” which we named childhood buddies, in the form of second sacred “friends” which we name teachers and in the form of “he” and “she” which we named best friends. After all “friends” are the only reason why we are alive and “friends” are the only reason why PLATO declared “we are social animals”!!!
HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY!

Birthday Or Backday

"MANY MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY, MY LORD, MY LAMA, MY GURU, MY KING H. H. THE DALAI LAMA, MAY YOU LIVE MORE THAN HUNDRED YEARS WITH GREAT HEALTH TO LED US AND THIS WORLD TO PEACE AND HAPPY FUTURE" I woke up with this slogan to greet the day on 6th July 2010 which was a beautiful day. Some of my friends and other Tibetan sympathies were complaining the venue of this year's birthday celebration is mean to be far from the location where majority of Tibeten have their resident. But today is not a ordinary day, so almost all of us are certain to attend the celebration. We had our breakfast and except the young-age monks, everyone was excite about the journey they are going to take in the Bus organized by the monastery office. We were assembly in front of the the gompa shop with discussion about the estimate size and form of the celebration, one of the monk was saying that the Tibetan Settlement Office in Nepal had requested every registered monastery and institution to come up with less than two wish-written banners to livelihood the celebration. And all of them were accepting this sign is meant to be the celebration to be great success. And we believed that this is not only our duty but also responsibility of tibetan refugees in Nepal to implement every movement and ceremony related with Tibet to be unique in Nepal, because apart from Dharamsala, Nepal is the only second to that where every activity related to Tibet and Tibetan issue is carry on with great enthusiastic and success. So the legacy has to be continue and we hope so,
Suddenly one of the young monk was running passed us uttering that there is the police force present at the gate of the Monastery. Without exact comprehension of the situation we rushed to the gate and there were at least four personal of Nepal Armed Police Force. Gradually we came to know that there are also forces posted at Our nunnery, at Faika Chowk, at Boudhanath, at Chahabil, at patan, at Swayambu, at every corner of the way which lead to Jawalakel which is to be the place of celebration. Including the Nepali brothers, every one was quite confused with this reaction of Nepali government who gave permission to held the celebration with full participation of general citizen and Tibetans just one day back. Only restriction was that the Government issue statement in the newspapers to (www.thehimalayantimes.com) prohibit the participants of members of Nepali constituent Assembly to calm the ugly Chinese red government criticism. Subsequently we approach the personals and inquiry the validity of the document they released to give permission for the birthday celebration and their action which contradict to their own approval. One of the personal Told us that a group of tibetan people did held protest in front of the Chinese embassy day before birthday and consequently were arrest and put in jail. He continued in Nepali "tubai arulai hezu jullus gare ra asre paiko ne." ( your guys did protest yesterday, so today is the reaction of your strike) For a second we were not sure what to expect from the police furthermore, and at the same time we were not sure how we going to understand the situation because we have not knowledge of the protest and arrest. Our group dismiss for a while, and were lost in thought. After one hour, monks were saying that around 35 tibetans had protest in front of the Chinese embassy and lately they were claimed to be the follower of Dorje Shugden who is the controversial deity in tibetan community, who's followers are believed to be close to the Chinese government which finance them in every way to woe them for their cruelty usage. Our doubts were clear but not nearest to the satisfaction because we heard around 300 tibetans were arrest and put in jail on day main day for merely the action of participating the celebration.
As in Tibetan Proverb, "even a child who murder his own father has a reason to claim his innocence" Nepali police personal claimed to be innocence and blamed the cause back to tibetan community, but the reality will always remain behind the curtain of politics and economic. No matter the reaction of Nepali government is either compel from the Nepali parties or bullied by Chinese Government or even fuel by Shugden group. The actual circumstance suffered by the Tibetan people and its supporters was exact remind of 2008 when Nepali government crashed the protesters and were put in jail as they are the Chinese force.
EVERY TIBETAN IN NEPAL IS WONDERING IF IT IS BIRTHDAY OR BACKDAY! God bless Tibet!

Gone with rainbows...

Whenever i think about him i can't avoid the exclamation words that he used when he met someone or something unexpectly, Last year when i went to get his bless in his room, it was not much bigger than the room i have in my university which is suitable for two beds, only difference is his room was bathroom attached. On the alter which cover one third of the rooms was placed with pictures of great Lamas and deities. Seven bowls of glass was lined on the edge of the alter to offer water, just near the alter was his bed with a reading table tag with it. he was sitting cross legs on his quite big bed and was reciting some books from Buddhist scripture. I approached him and stretch the Kadak on his reading table than was about to leave when he made one noise like "who are you?" i was not able to hear him properly as he was 94 years old and stammering. I assumed to my supposition and stay there for him to speak further, he asked me again like "who are you?" than i told him my name and he stay for few minutes contemplating on those few words like i gave him a name of a place far away in his memory. Than suddenly he made that funny but sincere exclamation. "Jho Rinpo Kerang Yinpa?" I was like "Nga Yin" but i was not sure who he mean "Kerang". (means YOU in Tibetan Language) Promptly he fingered towards the cushion that is laying on the floor and indicate me to sit with his unclear words. I sat on the cushion which was laying above the grey dragon decorated carpet and curiously watch his next move. Actually i attempted few times to get up and assist him on whatever he wants to do but he reluctantly waved me away and open the door of the cupboard with great difficulty. After few minutes (which seems few hours to me because i was sure it took great effort for him to bend and search things as he is 94 years old! and worst part is he seems like swear to not allowing my assistance.) inspection, took out a plastic bag which was filled with eatable things like biscuits, chocolates and candy, than he picked one vest from the same cupboard and stirred it into the plastic. He gradually passed that to me and said something, But i was not able to understand what he was saying though i was sure it is about the study and personality that he wants me to care and improve. I exit after giving few bows to shown my respect whether he could see it or not! I was in mix emotions after leaving his room, i was happy because he recognized me and i was sad because he gave me something. In the last thirteen years i have seen him circling around the monastery with great devotion and sincerity, in this more than one decade, i could do nothing to him but offering few bows, though i have that strong determination to assist him in whatever way after my graduation and i was optimist that the day will come when i can fulfill this dream. But how i can know this will remain dream,,,
I was with my new sister in Boudha nath who was briefing me about my family in the last more than one decade. I felt like walking on street with head reverse to back side with dim landscape. After hours we had our lunch and they were (she and her husband) determined to keep me night over there. In normal condition, i would happily accept their warm invitation but i have that nerve and anxiety which draw me back to monastery. I try to overpower it but not use, so eventually i made some excuses and went back. On my way i drop at the supermarket where my friend was working after he disrobed, he was not in his usual happy and funny mood, lately he told me that Geshe Kyachok (name of the demise monk who was 95 years old) took his last breath that after noon. I was too shock to utter a word, largely not because he is gone but because few minutes back i have that strong feeling which drew me. He is 95 years old now, for a human being or should i rather say, for a tibetan 95 is not a young age, i heard he was facing difficult to lead daily life because of his old age. And every one was rejoicing his longing.After that i promptly leave for monastery. My arrival was greet with a declaration of congregating religious gathering on his behave, and i attend the TSOK after few years in my own monastery. In fact i am not very fond of attending so, for that i have my own reason, but this time i can't keep myself away from assembly with reason. So did attend the TSOK and was relieved to felt my own inclusion in the hall. My friends were talking about haven seen of rainbows suddenly appear around the monastery and they have photos to prove their proclamation. When i asked about his status, my friends told me that he is in THUN which means post-meditation after death. In Buddhist perception we believe that great yogi and practitioners have that power to control their mind and focus on something even after scientifically they are declare dead, and he possess complete control over the situation of this meditation. We were not sure how many days he will stay on that position. We had same situation few years back who stayed on the similar meditation for more than four days and when he was cremated we found lots of relics which was enough evidence for convince others of Buddhist religious and dharma. On the next day, me with some senior colleagues attended one smaller congregation, also in that day we saw lots of different rainbows shining from here to there and there to here. People said they saw four different rainbows, but at least i saw two of them from the room where his body was kept. I had a good look on his countenance and his looks tempt me of his passed away.
Around 6pm, Our Abbot announced that he had release the post-meditation and he is ready for cremation. though it was raining lightly, we gather around the place where he was to cremate, unlike other monks, he was to cremate in the monastery ground which itself is a great honor. Something more than hundred monks were gather to arrange the stand and all the things, we run here and there to collect cushions, tables, religious clothes, ritual instruments and at the mean time i visit one more time to his room where more than ten people were about to clean him and dress him in special clothe for cremation. Around 8pm, started by Abbot, Supervisor and Geshes, more than 700 monks and nuns gather around the place, plus more than 100 foreigners who are in the monastery for retreat and meditation course. The TSOK last for five hours and it end at 1am in the morning. But all the attendants surprisingly in great form and slightest sign of tired and exhaustion is never to be seen.
I closed my eyes and visualized the moments that i was determined to have with him after my graduation and pray for his rebirth in quick succession. I am happy to inform and heard that we found relics from his ashes! "Jho rinpo kerang khabar yo?"

When we met.

On that unexpected condition, normally i would not have leave my sister's home even someone invited me to have dinner in YAK restaurant { which is my favorite in Nepal} for the exchange of going back to monastery, because i found one new sister! Yeah,,, i can understand you will find it funny, but the real funny thing is she has been searching me for the last few years [ she told me later..] and only this year we met. That was quite amusing experience, first we talked on phone and she told me she used to be my classmate when i was child and she also brief me her reside in my home for several months when she was schooling in my hometown. But for God's sake, i remember nothing, and i confessed so with her. Despite of my rude reply, she invited me to her home on that ensued Saturday, and eventually we met after couples of phone calls and searching around the Boudha Nath. I had strong expectation, or rather called it wish [ because i don't want to embarrass myself and her as well with strange smile and glance!] that i may recognize her in the encounter after fourteen years of departure. But as to impersonalized my inner fear, i didn't recognized her! This time neither i got the nerves to ask her bio-data, nor her recognition of my appearance. So with forced smile and nervous walking, i went to her home and conversed. She asked me lots of things about my family and also describe some information which are related to the current condition of my family, and i didn't find it astonish when she show me the talent of having more information about my family than myself! Gradually i eased myself and had lunch which was carefully serve to me with her husband who frequently asked me to sit on bed with stretch legs because he thinks that will make reduction in my trembling body, At the beginning i refuse, but later i surrender to his adamant and found he was right. He is very simple in his reaction towards the new stranger his wife picked up from somewhere (which means me!) his personality gave me two options to judge him which are either he is a simple and kind person, or he is a showy and ostentatious person who is expert in concealing the dark side behind the artificial smile. On which side my assumption shine is matter of time and mystery because i am sure at least i have to spend few years before i decide what he is, for now. I like my new sister and her family.
Well, i spent my day until it is 6pm in the evening than went back to the place where i came. It is was rather simultaneity than shyness when i leave her place. I got that innate feeling which compel me to race back, and later i found what was the cause, which is to be reveal in another composition heh heh.

Journey with B-2

I am settle in one place few days ago and in peace if you ask me. But the memory of the journey with B is recapping in my sight that it is difficult to have the usual whim in my mind. { not the like the thing you imagine now...} The unforgettable moments of traveling in train, bus, tempo, rickshow and on my own foot is frequently flashing like a bright light, off which burglar try to avoid. Its action is what we called Back Back and Back without slightest sign of Backward.

K.K part-6

Once upon a time i told her to log on Twitter which is contemporaly a growing social web. And as a good girl, she listened and did open one account but of course as usual with an question. What is the use of this web? Well, i couldn't described her head to toe because i was new to the web and also really don't know how to start the description. But now she is here with complete comprehension of the said web. Her previous account was lost or let lost as that was created under my persuation, contrary to this, voluntary is the foundation of her second entry to this social web, so i extremely hopes she will keep on updating her comments.
When we said social, we means the congregation of people and surrounding which plays essential role in the life of every individual, hence it is our responsibility to explore it with complete honest comments splout from our mind. Also it is important to depict our own days of life and happenings to the people who cares and take tremendous interset in us. For me that is the sole purpose of admitting in this kind of social network. Maybe this is the reason i wasn't able to share with you at the beginning. Well,,,Whatsoever, i am happy happy happy to see you here and please let me remind you onething, plesae do continues with updating as i don't want to see your account which tag with "last update one year ago"!!! hehehe

A Good Shock!

I have been pursuing the news channels from my mobile since i heard the news of one girl who is participating in MISS TIBET contest! To tell the truth, it wasn't a shock for me because i think she is capable of doing such things. It is true we have not share even a light moment of tea-chat together though studying in same campus, but i had quite knowledge of her courage and capability as we had only around 400 students in the campus, and it is easy to keep your ears open hehe! I heard she is independent and confident with her behaviour and activities which is a good and necessary equippment for success in life. and she is also beautiful. After i found she is crowned MISS TIBET, i wrote a congratulate message on the web and proudly told one guy who is coach mate on my train back to Delhi. I was so happy though i don't know her personally because she is from my campus and most importantly she proved herself under all that scandal and hindrence. She deserved it !!!

It might be true life is God gift, and it is true life is greatest present from our parents but without identification of life is not life, i always think how many people in the world might know us, for instance about me,, Um,,,,,,,around two hundred or may be thousand but not more that this figure, than just count how many people in this world. Twelve billion and counting!!! Wow! Interseting haina? You might misunderstood me, i am not a hunger of fame or wealth. Carving mark in our life which can be a source of identification after our death is not deals merely with fame or name. It is about making life meaningful. Than of course, what does mean by meaningful? From my perception, meaningful means useful, which means cultivating ray to sight the others than sole. To do that, we can't confine ourself in one room or may be in one family and get satistified with it, it is about confronting challenges and conquering them. To do that we need courage and confident. We Buddhists always talk about altruism and compassion etc, but mostly we care only about ourself and surrounding when it comes to action. I don't agree that the motivation we have for all sentient being is forged and fake, it is genuie but only thing which curtain this great thought from expossion is lake of confidence and courage.